5. Unforgiveness

Often, church sermons focus on behaviors normally a litany of do’s and don’ts when it comes to a disciple’s spiritual life. When someone hurts us (especially within the church body) we suppress our feelings, failing to deal with it quickly and effectively. This causes bitterness and resentment to take root, separating us from God. Christians carry this unforgiveness around for months (and in some cases, years) without reconciling with the offender.

Matthew 18:15-17 states, “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses. If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.”

Churches have to have a format on how to deal with conflict and hurt effectively. If churches can figure out healthy ways to help congregants deal with each other and others outside the church body in a healthy way, the body of Christ as a whole will be better for it.

Erick Bouwmeester